It’s hard to believe almost 20 months have passed since my last blog post. A month after I took maternity leave from sex work, I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Since then I’ve experienced a plethora of emotions from heart wrenching joy to debilitating grief. I’ve had ups higher than Mount Edith Cavell in Jasper National Park and I’ve had lows deeper than the deepest parts of the Lac St-Joseph near Québec City.
Two weeks after my daughter was born, OIC hosted it’s second social in the party room of my condo building. It was an amazing experience. My mother was upstairs with my daughter, and I occasionally went to see them to breastfeed my daughter as I mingled with everyone present. Since then, we’ve launched the OIC website, we’ve had two other socials, and our membership has grown immensely. I’m so proud of everything we’ve accomplished as a community, and I’m proud I continued to work for the collective during my maternity leave.
In September 2018, I decided to go back to school full-time! What the fuck was I thinking? My daughter was 7-months-old!
I love the intellectual stimulation. I needed it while I taught my daughter the basics of crawling, walking, eating, etc. I still have a year to go before I finish.
A couple weeks after I started my degree, my best friend died by suicide. We were both 7-months-postpartum. It was a loss of epic proportions for me, because it was with her that I shared my mothering journey (hence the low deeper than the Lac St-Joseph!) I will remember my relationship with her and her son for the rest of my life.
In May 2019, I learned that I my mother had metastatic small cell lung cancer. I thought the world was a cruel place, for taking my best friend and mother within months of each other. I decided to spend the summer in Québec City, since I didn’t know how long my mother would be with us. Due to various medical advances, she’s receiving a mix of chemotherapy and immunotherapy. As a result, her tumor shrunk, and scans show the cancer has stopped spreading. It looks like my mother will be with us for some time, and for that, I’m eternally grateful. These moments with her are so precious, and I feel like I’ve had the best summer of my life despite all of its challenges. It looks like she’ll be around to entertain my daughter for a couple more years.
My daughter started daycare in early September, and with that, I have more time for myself, and for you.
Starting September 16, I will be booking appointments with old and new friends.
I’m so looking forward to seeing you again, or meeting you if it’s the first time we’ve spent time together. I feel like being with you will be an opportunity for us both to temporarily leave our lives behind and enjoy ourselves through laughter, connection, and physical and emotional intimacy.
I hope you feel the same way,